A Shocking Discovery

August 7, 2014,

Playground Day!  There was a transformer being replaced on Hope St. today, just as the lemonade man arrived.  The kids were very excited to see what was going on with the bucket truck and the guys, so we plunked ourselves down where we could get a good view.  Today it has been almost a full week since my last chemo treatment, so I thought I would be able to bring lemonade from one side of the park to the other without a problem, especially if I had a tray.  Unfortunately there were no trays available today.  Now I had a dilemma.  How was I going to get five lemonades across the park to the waiting children? Thinking that if I walked quickly, I might be able to do it, I picked the five cups up between my fingers and started hustling across the grass.  Unfortunately, I did not make it very far before I had intense pain in my fingers.  I quickly veered off toward a bench and set all of the lemonade cups down.  There was a woman and a boy sitting on the bench who told me they would watch it for me while I ran to get help. 

Fortunately, there was a dad there who came to the rescue.  Rafa had stopped by with his children to visit and watch the transformer being installed with us.  He went and got our lemonade, and made us very happy.

August 8, 2014

When it is time to put the kids down for naps, I hold them and sing to them.  Since I sing the same songs every day, I am able to read and sing at the same time.  Today, I was reading The Cancer Cookbook.  This is a book full of delicious recipes that can help in surviving treatment and recovery from cancer.  They are wholesome recipes, full of things a body needs to repair the damage done from the drugs taken to combat cancer while making your body stronger.  It offers suggestions to help combat nausea and other side effects frequently caused by the potent drugs that are pumped into your body.

There is a list of foods that help fight cancer before it starts.  As I read the list, it makes me sad.  Many of the foods on the list are foods I frequently eat.  Some every day, and plentifully.

I know there is no magic pill that can cure it, and I am sure that there are plenty of things in our environment that promote its growth.  I know that genetics play a big part in cancer, and I understand  it could even be nature's way to assure our mortality. Still, reading a list of things that might help prevent it, knowing these are things I regularly consume, is just too much.

I am tired and sad at the end of my workday.  I need to pick up some olive oil from the specialty shop that is near my house for a birthday party I will be attending tomorrow.  As I walk I contemplate calling Steve and telling him I can't meet him downtown as I had planned. I am sure I will not be good company, and I really don't feel like it. 

As I walk home, Steve calls.  He sounds excited that I will be meeting him, and he is waiting downtown for me.  I tell him I will meet him soon, even though I don't feel like it.

Before I reach my house, I feel it is urgent to change my bag.  I get home to find the seal is just about to break.  I change in record time and make it out to the bus just as it approaches my stop.  Steve is waiting for me at the tunnel on South Main St.  

We get dinner at Viva Mexico and head over to the Hiroshima and Nagasaki Memorial that is happening by the river.  Steve has been asked to film it, and I am happy to participate in the setting up and observation of the event.  It is peaceful and thoughtful, and the falling night is beautiful.  Watching the moon rise in the sky, thinking about where I am and why, I am glad that I came out this evening and glad I made the effort.  Even though I thought I was doing this for Steven, it turned out it was just what I needed to do for myself.